How am I going to cope?

What I really need is:

a) A big white toilet that I can strap to my ass so that I can wee at any time without interrupting my life every 6 seconds
b) A bigger bloody bladder
c) Less thirst damn it, it doesn't help matters!

One might think when reading the above that I MUST be pregnant because everyone knows that pregnant ladies wee, a LOT. Unfortunately this isn't necessarily the case because I have and always have had, a very small bladder, and clearly a very short tube connecting my mouth to the acorn sized container where liquid is stored briefly before needing to be expelled.

I need to wee all the time, often within minutes of the last wee and it's not as if I get ample warning either. One minute I am blissfully comfortable and the next I feel like someone has forcefully injected seventy-five million liters of water into my body. I try holding it so that my bladder 'learns' (is this an old wives tale that parents tell their kids when they want to go to the loo all the time) to hold more liquid, but it HURTS and I don't like pain much.

Also, if I hold it I get infections and they are so not cool.

All this makes me wonder how the hell I'm going to cope (note the neat inclusion of the header) if I ever do fall pregnant. Surely it is not possible for me to need to pee any more frequently than I already do?

God, I hope not, cause if it gets any worse I'll be camping out in the bathroom and this will seriously impact on kitten cuddle time*.

VP

* No this is not some weird euphemism, I spend a large portion of my evenings cuddling the cats :-)